1 00:01:00,142 --> 00:01:04,396 Presenters Yuen Kam-Lun, Norman Cheung Sek-Gui 2 00:01:18,035 --> 00:01:22,039 Producer Yuen Kam-Lun Executive Producer Wong Siu-Ming 3 00:01:58,367 --> 00:02:00,077 Planning Rico Chu Tak-On Production Manager Lee Wah 4 00:02:00,411 --> 00:02:02,329 Screenplay Ho Tung Associate Production Manager Law Sau Wai 5 00:02:30,274 --> 00:02:31,900 Director of Photography Eric Chu Kwok Fai 6 00:02:32,234 --> 00:02:34,569 Art Direction David Lo Kin-Ming Joey Wong Styling Kenneth Yee Chung Man 7 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:50,669 Action Directors: Poon Kin Kwan, Benz Kong To-hoi, Steve Mak Fei-hung 8 00:02:51,003 --> 00:02:53,338 Car Stunts: Bruce Law Lai Yin, Bruce Law Stunts Unlimited 9 00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,398 Assistant Director Michelle Wong Yuk-Ting, Paco Yiu Fung-Suen 10 00:03:11,732 --> 00:03:13,233 Editor Cheung Bei-Tak Special Effects Stephen Ma Man-Yin 11 00:03:13,859 --> 00:03:16,736 BELOVED FATHER BELOVED MOTHER 12 00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:36,715 Music Philip Chan Fei Lit Theme Song "Tian Di You You" 13 00:03:44,140 --> 00:03:46,058 Starring Lam Ching Ying, Joey Wong, Shing Fui-On 14 00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,685 Anthony Wong, Gabriel Wong Yat-San, Rico Chu Tak-On 15 00:04:08,831 --> 00:04:13,293 Director Wilson Yip Shing Hong 16 00:04:21,969 --> 00:04:25,514 You can't escape my Supernatural Fan! 17 00:04:38,986 --> 00:04:39,903 Stab! 18 00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,557 Shoot. 19 00:05:10,684 --> 00:05:13,019 Little Turtle, stop pretending to be asleep. 20 00:05:13,354 --> 00:05:14,146 Come here. 21 00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:16,899 What is it, sifu? 22 00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:19,860 You didn't think to mention that a poisonous snake was in my pants? 23 00:05:20,194 --> 00:05:21,278 Are you trying to test me? 24 00:05:21,612 --> 00:05:24,656 Sifu, why would I bother you with something so simple? 25 00:05:24,990 --> 00:05:26,449 Now that would be insulting! 26 00:05:27,243 --> 00:05:29,119 If only you were half as smart as your excuses. 27 00:05:29,453 --> 00:05:32,038 Well, then you better teach me more moves, Sifu. 28 00:05:32,706 --> 00:05:35,333 Pack up, and let's get on the road. 29 00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,294 Such a chatterbox. 30 00:05:42,132 --> 00:05:44,092 Sifu, snake! Help! 31 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,929 Sifu! Help! 32 00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:54,019 An Eternal Combat 33 00:07:25,986 --> 00:07:27,862 Wait, sifu, let me finish! 34 00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:52,513 You've finally returned to me. 35 00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:05,651 Darling, now you're mine forever. 36 00:08:31,885 --> 00:08:33,469 What demon are you? 37 00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:09,381 Sifu, sifu... 38 00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,508 You've got the upper hand, let's give chase! 39 00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:15,554 Demon, I have underestimated you. 40 00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:17,472 Reassess if you've underestimated. 41 00:09:17,806 --> 00:09:19,808 Why are you just standing around like a dummy? 42 00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:31,111 My Lord, what do you think? 43 00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:33,238 What do I think? How the hell do I know? 44 00:09:33,572 --> 00:09:34,781 Six more dead! 45 00:09:35,115 --> 00:09:36,658 Boy do I wish I was one of you. 46 00:09:36,992 --> 00:09:39,828 This is all your fault! 47 00:09:41,455 --> 00:09:42,706 Why are you standing here? 48 00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:45,375 You...you are? 49 00:09:49,379 --> 00:09:51,756 Lord Ma! 50 00:09:52,382 --> 00:09:54,300 Your servant greets Lord Ma. 51 00:09:54,676 --> 00:09:57,095 Quit the yammering, and lower your hands! 52 00:09:57,429 --> 00:09:58,304 Yes, sir. 53 00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:07,522 -Are you trying to get fired? -Have mercy, my lord! 54 00:10:07,856 --> 00:10:08,565 Have mercy! 55 00:10:08,899 --> 00:10:11,526 There's a demon out there, and you're in here playing with corpses? 56 00:10:11,860 --> 00:10:12,735 No, I was-- 57 00:10:13,070 --> 00:10:14,863 No? What? 58 00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,740 Who said you could speak? 59 00:10:19,576 --> 00:10:20,702 Please continue, my lord. 60 00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:25,749 Listen up! 61 00:10:26,250 --> 00:10:29,294 You have seven days to bring me that Japanese Demon King! 62 00:10:29,628 --> 00:10:31,254 Or get a noose fitted and hang yourself! 63 00:10:31,588 --> 00:10:34,549 Which is to say, you should hang yourself in eight days. 64 00:10:34,883 --> 00:10:39,137 What.. . what? Hang myself”? No, please! 65 00:10:39,471 --> 00:10:40,972 May I drink arsenic instead? 66 00:10:41,306 --> 00:10:43,141 His Majesty's decree has arrived! 67 00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:53,189 (Stuttering) His Majesty, the Son of Heaven, appoints 68 00:10:54,194 --> 00:10:56,905 Ma Sheung-fung a Royal Official. 69 00:10:57,239 --> 00:11:01,739 He loves his people as if they were his own sons, has been recognised. 70 00:11:04,496 --> 00:11:06,789 He is hereby promoted three ranks, 71 00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,001 to be a first rank official. 72 00:11:10,335 --> 00:11:11,377 We're saved, my lord! 73 00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:15,340 Long Live His Majesty! 74 00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:20,758 (Stuttering) What's the rush? 75 00:11:21,555 --> 00:11:25,559 (Stuttering) I'm not finished reading. 76 00:11:26,351 --> 00:11:27,143 -Yes. -We 77 00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:29,437 (Stuttering) We... 78 00:11:29,771 --> 00:11:30,855 We... what? 79 00:11:34,234 --> 00:11:35,735 My lord, you have it upside down. 80 00:11:36,069 --> 00:11:37,111 You don't think I know that? 81 00:11:37,487 --> 00:11:38,863 If you're so smart, you read it! 82 00:11:42,784 --> 00:11:44,535 -May I not read it, sir? -No! 83 00:11:44,953 --> 00:11:46,496 -I really must read? -and quickly too! 84 00:11:46,830 --> 00:11:47,330 Yes. 85 00:11:48,749 --> 00:11:51,668 We have heard that the Demon King is in your county 86 00:11:52,002 --> 00:11:54,004 terrorizing the peasants, murdering without blinking. 87 00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:56,882 We order you, Official Ma, to capture and contain this demon. 88 00:11:57,216 --> 00:12:00,594 We give you seven days, no extensions. 89 00:12:02,429 --> 00:12:04,264 Here ends the royal proclamation. 90 00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,059 Here ends the royal proclamation! 91 00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:10,520 What if we had an extra day or two? 92 00:12:10,854 --> 00:12:12,105 (Stuttering) Of course... 93 00:12:12,439 --> 00:12:13,231 Not! 94 00:12:13,857 --> 00:12:18,357 (Stuttering) You better get a noose fitted for yourself on the eighth day! 95 00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:26,953 I, Ma Sheung-fung, have been an official for many years. 96 00:12:27,287 --> 00:12:30,081 And though I have no big contributions, I have also never done anything bad. 97 00:12:30,415 --> 00:12:32,458 Why is disaster striking me now? 98 00:12:39,841 --> 00:12:42,760 My five darling wives, I know you're unable to help me. 99 00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:45,514 (Wives enumerated, nameless) If you could have helped me, 100 00:12:45,847 --> 00:12:48,724 you would have helped long ago, right? 101 00:12:50,310 --> 00:12:52,395 My darling wives, please drink with me. 102 00:12:54,815 --> 00:12:57,150 Papa, papa! 103 00:12:57,484 --> 00:12:59,110 You said you'd buy me new clothes! 104 00:12:59,444 --> 00:13:01,237 Papa, you said you'd get me new shoes! 105 00:13:01,571 --> 00:13:02,738 Buy me toys! 106 00:13:03,073 --> 00:13:06,743 Shut up! Don't you know your Father is in trouble? 107 00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,329 My lord, no need to worry! 108 00:13:10,122 --> 00:13:12,415 Your servant has heard that 10 miles from here, 109 00:13:12,749 --> 00:13:15,960 a learned man, a dragon among pigs, lives in a hut. 110 00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:19,047 He's a master of the supernatural, his skills are boundless. 111 00:13:19,673 --> 00:13:22,676 My lord, let's visit him in person. 112 00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:26,721 Why didn't you say anything earlier? 113 00:13:27,055 --> 00:13:28,514 It's your fault I've been drinking alone! 114 00:13:32,311 --> 00:13:36,811 Hey, could it be any farther? I'm so fucking tired. Aren't you tired? 115 00:13:37,691 --> 00:13:41,486 My lord, you're just out of practice. We're almost there. 116 00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:45,782 Are we there yet? 117 00:13:46,408 --> 00:13:48,326 Just the mountain across the way. 118 00:13:48,660 --> 00:13:50,536 -Then start walking! -Yes, yes. 119 00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:55,124 Are you crazy? You call this a hut? 120 00:13:55,542 --> 00:13:56,834 I'm guessing this is it. 121 00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:58,295 If it isn't, you're screwed! 122 00:13:59,796 --> 00:14:02,548 Advisor, how could someone live in this hut? 123 00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,259 I'd say it's a toilet! 124 00:14:05,677 --> 00:14:07,512 My lord, my lord! 125 00:14:07,846 --> 00:14:09,013 The Cho Lo Residence. 126 00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:11,058 -What is it? -I'm sure this is not a toilet 127 00:14:11,391 --> 00:14:14,769 -You sniffed around? -It's written here, see? 128 00:14:15,937 --> 00:14:17,438 Go to hell! 129 00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:19,024 You know I'm illiterate! 130 00:14:20,108 --> 00:14:22,276 You motherfucker, thankfully no one heard that. 131 00:14:22,611 --> 00:14:23,612 Go announce my arrival! 132 00:14:23,945 --> 00:14:25,446 Alright, I will. 133 00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:27,449 You probably kicked open my hernia. 134 00:14:28,533 --> 00:14:29,825 -Hurry up and announce! -Yes! 135 00:14:33,663 --> 00:14:38,000 The Royal Guard of the First Rank, Ma Sheung-fung! 136 00:14:38,335 --> 00:14:40,420 Lord Ma has arrived! 137 00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:43,715 Hey, when did I get that extra title? 138 00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,550 It's trendy to exaggerate. 139 00:14:46,259 --> 00:14:47,468 Yeah? 140 00:14:48,845 --> 00:14:51,305 Here is, the governor of two provinces, 141 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:52,682 Exaggerate? 142 00:14:59,106 --> 00:15:00,065 How did that happen? 143 00:15:03,276 --> 00:15:05,903 My lord, this is the power of illusion. 144 00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:07,697 -Illusion? -illusion! 145 00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:11,701 Hey, Advisor, quit horsing around. Let's get out of here. 146 00:15:13,662 --> 00:15:16,456 My lord, this is also magic. 147 00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:18,625 Fuck. 148 00:15:19,543 --> 00:15:20,460 What should we do, sir? 149 00:15:20,794 --> 00:15:21,920 Forward, what else? 150 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:23,797 Come, let's go together! 151 00:15:30,887 --> 00:15:32,889 I was wondering what fell in, 152 00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:34,766 but it turns out its two wet dogs? 153 00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:38,228 -Why you... -Fuck you! 154 00:15:38,728 --> 00:15:41,397 On shore you look more like wet chickens. 155 00:15:42,315 --> 00:15:44,608 You little shit, how dare you insult us! Beat him up! 156 00:15:44,943 --> 00:15:45,777 Yes! 157 00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:52,367 You motherfucker, who is the boss here? 158 00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,285 -You are. -You want to beat me up? 159 00:15:54,619 --> 00:15:56,078 You can boast about it. 160 00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:57,747 You pocket-sized twerp, 161 00:15:58,081 --> 00:15:59,290 -Bring it! - How are you! 162 00:15:59,624 --> 00:16:01,584 -Where can you go? -Little Turtle, behave! 163 00:16:03,753 --> 00:16:05,337 Sir, it's Cho Lo, the Tao Master. 164 00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:07,424 Sifu. 165 00:16:12,053 --> 00:16:15,639 Please forgive me for the welcome, my lord. 166 00:16:17,976 --> 00:16:22,105 It is an honor for us that you have travelled so far. 167 00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:23,815 Sifu. 168 00:16:24,441 --> 00:16:25,567 Please have some tea. 169 00:16:30,989 --> 00:16:32,323 Bring another cup immediately. 170 00:16:32,657 --> 00:16:35,701 Sifu, no one ever visits us. 171 00:16:36,036 --> 00:16:37,829 We only had the two cups. 172 00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:56,556 In that case, let's share, Lord Ma. 173 00:17:02,229 --> 00:17:05,023 Lord, is the tea not to your liking? 174 00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:08,193 You old weasel, how dare you try to fool me with your illusions! 175 00:17:08,610 --> 00:17:10,945 How dare you take me for a fool just because I'm polite! 176 00:17:11,446 --> 00:17:12,780 I better stay back. 177 00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:17,911 This style is called Horizontal Sweep of a Thousand Troops. 178 00:17:18,245 --> 00:17:20,163 My lord, show him Dividing the Mountain. 179 00:17:28,004 --> 00:17:30,172 My lord, what about Through the Roof? 180 00:17:40,475 --> 00:17:44,562 Amazing! Show him your One Armed Coolie as well! 181 00:17:44,896 --> 00:17:46,939 Nonsense, can't you tell that old man is frozen stiff with fear? 182 00:17:47,274 --> 00:17:47,732 Take the guandao. 183 00:17:48,066 --> 00:17:48,691 Fear? 184 00:17:49,025 --> 00:17:50,234 My sifu is just embarrassed for you! 185 00:17:50,569 --> 00:17:52,571 Let me show you some real stuff. 186 00:17:52,904 --> 00:17:54,280 Broaden your horizons. 187 00:17:55,824 --> 00:17:57,867 Advisor, what is this dangly weapon? 188 00:17:58,201 --> 00:18:00,578 Some sort of rope dart, but not very lethal. 189 00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:05,000 You're as ignorant as you look. 190 00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:08,169 This is a dart javelin. 191 00:18:08,503 --> 00:18:10,213 Your javelin seems awfully soft. 192 00:18:13,633 --> 00:18:16,010 Sifu, could I borrow some Magic Water? 193 00:18:17,887 --> 00:18:19,555 Be frugal, it's hard to make. 194 00:18:20,140 --> 00:18:21,224 Sure will! 195 00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:35,071 Rope Dart? Beat this! 196 00:18:35,488 --> 00:18:39,950 Poke, poke. 197 00:18:41,911 --> 00:18:43,037 It's real! 198 00:18:43,371 --> 00:18:44,246 It sure is! 199 00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:51,796 It's really hard. 200 00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:55,049 My lord, if you rubbed it on your thing, imagine how hard it would get! 201 00:18:55,383 --> 00:18:57,718 -Where? -Where you dangle. 202 00:18:58,053 --> 00:19:00,430 -Give it back to me! -Go to hell! 203 00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:02,265 You fucking shortcake, I'll crush you! 204 00:19:02,599 --> 00:19:03,182 Sifu 205 00:19:08,772 --> 00:19:11,691 You think just because you look big that I'll be scared? 206 00:19:13,652 --> 00:19:15,945 My lord, it's not that they've gotten bigger. 207 00:19:16,279 --> 00:19:17,697 You've gotten smaller! 208 00:19:18,031 --> 00:19:19,032 This isn't an illusion. 209 00:19:20,533 --> 00:19:21,992 Let's see who gets crushed now! 210 00:19:22,535 --> 00:19:23,661 Die! 211 00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:30,584 Little Turtle! 212 00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:32,295 Behave. 213 00:19:33,129 --> 00:19:34,171 Go inside. 214 00:19:39,594 --> 00:19:40,553 Please rise. 215 00:19:42,514 --> 00:19:45,016 You really are a learned man. I am convinced. 216 00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:46,684 My lord, you're flattering me. 217 00:19:47,018 --> 00:19:48,686 -This way please. -You first, please. 218 00:19:49,813 --> 00:19:53,525 The true purpose of my visit Is to ask you for a favor. 219 00:19:53,858 --> 00:19:54,984 His Majesty-- 220 00:19:55,443 --> 00:19:57,570 My lord has proven his dedication, 221 00:19:57,904 --> 00:19:59,405 I'll do whatever I can to help. 222 00:19:59,739 --> 00:20:01,866 -But I have one condition. -I'll do anything! 223 00:20:03,576 --> 00:20:04,785 Will you sacrifice 224 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:06,830 Sacrifice what? My body? 225 00:20:07,247 --> 00:20:08,998 The condition is your life. 226 00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:10,416 My life... 227 00:20:10,750 --> 00:20:13,919 After you die, I will transform you into a gold-plated statue. 228 00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:17,507 Because you are a high-ranking official with protection from the Son of Heaven, 229 00:20:17,841 --> 00:20:19,008 The Demon King cannot harm you. 230 00:20:19,342 --> 00:20:21,218 Together with my student, you will be my guards. 231 00:20:21,553 --> 00:20:24,847 This is the only way to eradicate the Demon King. 232 00:20:25,181 --> 00:20:28,893 Hey, you're only a Taoist Priest. You're not a pharmacist. 233 00:20:29,227 --> 00:20:32,271 Don't think I'm bullshitting. Even if you're willing to die, I have to help you. 234 00:20:32,605 --> 00:20:36,066 You must keep your entire corpse. Otherwise your spirit and body will be separated. 235 00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:37,861 Think it over. 236 00:20:38,278 --> 00:20:40,697 You want my life? I'd be crazy to listen to you! 237 00:20:42,615 --> 00:20:45,117 Then consider me willing but unable to help. Goodbye. 238 00:20:47,954 --> 00:20:49,038 Nonsense... 239 00:20:49,956 --> 00:20:51,499 -Advisor, let's go. -Yes, sir! 240 00:20:57,338 --> 00:20:59,173 This isn't only Magic Water, 241 00:20:59,632 --> 00:21:02,092 it's Sacred Water! 242 00:21:03,762 --> 00:21:05,305 Even if it's improper, 243 00:21:05,722 --> 00:21:07,849 I have to move you. 244 00:21:09,017 --> 00:21:10,685 Come get your Mother's spirit tablet. 245 00:21:11,019 --> 00:21:11,894 Got it! 246 00:21:12,687 --> 00:21:14,480 - I want this one! -Your Mother had a mole. 247 00:21:14,814 --> 00:21:16,899 -That's not your Mother! -Give it back to me! 248 00:21:17,233 --> 00:21:18,067 I like this one! 249 00:21:18,401 --> 00:21:21,237 You kids are so annoying! They're all mothers, just take one. 250 00:21:21,571 --> 00:21:22,905 Your mother, your mother. 251 00:21:23,823 --> 00:21:24,782 Yours. 252 00:21:25,658 --> 00:21:27,284 Dad I have to pee. 253 00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:28,745 God you kids are annoying. 254 00:21:29,078 --> 00:21:31,455 I'm so tired, I'm so hungry! 255 00:21:32,332 --> 00:21:33,124 What's all this ruckus! 256 00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:34,375 I'm sleepy... 257 00:21:34,709 --> 00:21:36,627 We'll never get out of here at this rate. 258 00:21:36,961 --> 00:21:38,170 Alright, let's take a break. 259 00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:40,256 I'm so hungry! 260 00:21:44,803 --> 00:21:45,970 Eat some bananas. 261 00:21:46,304 --> 00:21:49,724 Bananas! 262 00:22:04,823 --> 00:22:06,825 What's a day without a woman? 263 00:22:07,158 --> 00:22:08,659 And with the future looking so bleak... 264 00:22:09,202 --> 00:22:11,245 Let's put this water to good use. 265 00:22:12,539 --> 00:22:15,291 Stay put while I go get something to eat, got it? 266 00:22:15,625 --> 00:22:16,876 Got it! 267 00:22:17,418 --> 00:22:19,503 I want the biggest one! 268 00:22:19,838 --> 00:22:20,797 Give it to me! 269 00:22:21,130 --> 00:22:21,964 Mister! 270 00:22:22,841 --> 00:22:25,426 Come get a drink, rest awhile! 271 00:22:28,263 --> 00:22:30,682 One, two, three, four. 272 00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:35,061 Four, three, two, one. 273 00:22:35,436 --> 00:22:38,522 There are five of us, and four bananas. 274 00:22:38,857 --> 00:22:40,316 How should we share them? 275 00:22:40,775 --> 00:22:43,611 Easy. She's the youngest and always pees herself. 276 00:22:43,945 --> 00:22:44,820 Let's skip her. 277 00:22:45,154 --> 00:22:46,530 You're exactly the same! 278 00:22:46,865 --> 00:22:49,200 You're the eldest, and always bullying us. 279 00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:51,118 The way I see it, you should go without! 280 00:22:51,452 --> 00:22:52,995 You don't have to fight. 281 00:22:53,329 --> 00:22:54,747 Let me help you. 282 00:22:55,081 --> 00:22:57,166 How? 283 00:22:58,835 --> 00:23:00,253 What's taking so long? 284 00:23:04,382 --> 00:23:06,425 Can we eat yet? 285 00:23:06,759 --> 00:23:10,429 -Just a minute, I have to peel it. -Hurry up! 286 00:23:11,681 --> 00:23:13,015 What's taking so long? 287 00:23:13,516 --> 00:23:14,517 My good sir, 288 00:23:14,851 --> 00:23:15,893 what's the rush? 289 00:23:16,227 --> 00:23:19,897 You want five girls! It takes time. 290 00:23:21,190 --> 00:23:23,233 I'm not the Emperor looking for concubines here! 291 00:23:24,193 --> 00:23:25,986 Oh, it's you, Lord Ma! 292 00:23:26,321 --> 00:23:28,323 What's with the costume? 293 00:23:28,781 --> 00:23:30,908 What's the problem? Haven't you seen a plain-clothes officer? 294 00:23:31,451 --> 00:23:34,954 Yes, of course, the five girls will be right here. 295 00:23:36,748 --> 00:23:38,833 If you were anyone else... You'd be waiting forever! 296 00:23:39,167 --> 00:23:41,043 Are you all ready yet? 297 00:23:41,377 --> 00:23:43,504 Yes! 298 00:23:44,547 --> 00:23:47,007 It'll be glorious! 299 00:23:50,511 --> 00:23:52,221 A bite for you, and a bite for me. 300 00:23:52,555 --> 00:23:54,557 A bite for you, and a bite for me. 301 00:23:57,143 --> 00:23:58,811 A bite for you, and a bite for me. 302 00:23:59,145 --> 00:24:00,771 A bite for you, and a bite for me. 303 00:24:01,105 --> 00:24:02,940 A thrust for you, and a thrust for you, 304 00:24:03,274 --> 00:24:04,733 and a thrust for you, and a thrust for you! 305 00:24:05,068 --> 00:24:06,444 A bite for you, and a bite for me. 306 00:24:06,778 --> 00:24:08,237 A bite for you, and a bite for me. 307 00:24:08,571 --> 00:24:09,947 Left! Right! 308 00:24:10,281 --> 00:24:12,157 A thrust for you, and a thrust for you! 309 00:24:12,659 --> 00:24:16,079 Lord Ma is legendary! We're screwed! 310 00:24:16,412 --> 00:24:19,498 I'm terrified! What should we do? 311 00:24:19,832 --> 00:24:21,542 -You go first! -No, you go first! 312 00:24:21,876 --> 00:24:23,794 Left! Right! 313 00:24:30,468 --> 00:24:32,261 One, two, three, four, five. 314 00:24:32,595 --> 00:24:34,430 Wasn't that fair? 315 00:24:34,764 --> 00:24:36,640 Yes! 316 00:24:36,975 --> 00:24:39,227 It's terrible! Terrible! 317 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:42,521 Lord Ma Sheung-fung is dead! 318 00:24:42,939 --> 00:24:45,191 -Come in, come in. -Bad news! Lord Ma is dead! 319 00:24:45,525 --> 00:24:48,444 Lord Ma Sheung-fung is dead! 320 00:24:48,861 --> 00:24:51,864 Lord Ma Sheung-fung is dead! 321 00:24:53,700 --> 00:24:54,492 Sifu! 322 00:24:54,826 --> 00:24:55,576 It's as you predicted! 323 00:24:55,910 --> 00:24:58,787 Ma Sheung-fung died at the brothel! 324 00:24:59,122 --> 00:25:01,624 He died of over-excitement from the Magic Water. 325 00:25:02,083 --> 00:25:03,542 This is a false death. 326 00:25:03,876 --> 00:25:07,629 Sifu, I don't see why we're wasting so much energy on him. 327 00:25:07,964 --> 00:25:09,256 He is a military officer. 328 00:25:09,590 --> 00:25:12,217 He's strong and skilled, and has the emperor's protection. 329 00:25:12,552 --> 00:25:15,096 He's useful. From now on, the two of you will be my Left-Right Guards. 330 00:25:15,430 --> 00:25:16,055 What? 331 00:25:16,514 --> 00:25:19,183 He is essential in our fight against the Demon King. 332 00:25:19,559 --> 00:25:20,601 Time is running out. 333 00:25:20,935 --> 00:25:22,937 He's still under the magic water's spell, let's get going. 334 00:25:23,396 --> 00:25:24,438 Yes, Sifu. 335 00:25:35,074 --> 00:25:37,284 You can stop looking around, Ma Sheung-fung 336 00:25:37,618 --> 00:25:40,954 I'm here to tell you you died in action in the brothel. 337 00:25:41,497 --> 00:25:44,124 I'm dead? You're crazy! 338 00:25:44,459 --> 00:25:45,543 I am unstoppable! 339 00:25:45,877 --> 00:25:49,213 You've got a screw loose! You'll die before me! 340 00:25:50,631 --> 00:25:51,840 -Lord Ma, -Enough! 341 00:25:52,175 --> 00:25:53,968 You're trying to fool me with illusions again? 342 00:25:54,302 --> 00:25:57,179 People have been trying to scare me since I was in my mother's womb! 343 00:25:57,513 --> 00:25:59,681 You don't believe me? Take a look. 344 00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:03,978 How does it look, Lord Ma? 345 00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:10,818 Trying to fool me? 346 00:26:11,277 --> 00:26:13,153 It does look quite like me. 347 00:26:13,488 --> 00:26:16,199 Looks like you? He is you! 348 00:26:18,534 --> 00:26:20,702 Nonsense, then who am I? 349 00:26:21,204 --> 00:26:24,874 You're the soul. What you see there is your corpse. 350 00:26:27,752 --> 00:26:28,669 You don't believe us? 351 00:26:31,214 --> 00:26:33,841 It won't hurt, even if I punch you! 352 00:26:34,175 --> 00:26:35,759 Nothing hurts! Punches! Slaps! 353 00:26:36,886 --> 00:26:37,845 Hey! 354 00:26:38,179 --> 00:26:40,181 Are you crazy? How dare you beat me up like that? 355 00:26:46,479 --> 00:26:48,439 Hey, what can you find out with just that? 356 00:26:48,773 --> 00:26:49,899 Let me! 357 00:26:50,316 --> 00:26:51,692 Front somersault! 358 00:26:52,026 --> 00:26:55,029 Back somersault! Body slam! 359 00:26:56,197 --> 00:26:57,323 Delightful! 360 00:26:57,657 --> 00:26:58,949 Another front somersault! 361 00:26:59,283 --> 00:27:01,660 And another back somersault! Crush, crush! 362 00:27:02,787 --> 00:27:03,662 This is so fun! 363 00:27:03,996 --> 00:27:06,665 Stomp, wiggle, stomp, wiggle... 364 00:27:08,292 --> 00:27:10,711 This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, for the final effort, 365 00:27:13,673 --> 00:27:16,467 Are you insane? How dare you stomp me like that! I'll kill you! 366 00:27:20,471 --> 00:27:22,139 So you finally believe. 367 00:27:24,559 --> 00:27:25,643 I'm dead? 368 00:27:26,894 --> 00:27:27,978 Now what? 369 00:27:28,354 --> 00:27:30,731 I'm really dead? I don't want to be dead! 370 00:27:31,065 --> 00:27:32,024 I don't want to be dead! 371 00:27:32,358 --> 00:27:33,609 Help me! 372 00:27:33,943 --> 00:27:36,445 Please, Taoist Priest, please save me. 373 00:27:36,779 --> 00:27:37,571 You need not be sad. 374 00:27:37,905 --> 00:27:39,448 This was fated. 375 00:27:39,782 --> 00:27:42,993 I understand you were a good official in your life. 376 00:27:43,327 --> 00:27:45,537 So I have called back your spirit. 377 00:27:46,998 --> 00:27:49,375 Yes, you are now a god. 378 00:27:49,709 --> 00:27:52,378 Don't you feel powerful? 379 00:27:55,506 --> 00:27:56,715 Generals Gold and Silver! 380 00:27:57,049 --> 00:27:57,883 Yes! 381 00:27:58,509 --> 00:27:59,218 Yes... 382 00:27:59,677 --> 00:28:03,180 I hereby declare you my Left-Right guards. 383 00:28:03,514 --> 00:28:05,974 To work together to kill the Demon King. 384 00:28:06,309 --> 00:28:09,020 I vow to always remain at your side. 385 00:28:31,042 --> 00:28:32,501 Sifu, the demon is arriving. 386 00:28:35,463 --> 00:28:36,380 Be careful! 387 00:28:46,015 --> 00:28:46,724 Retreat! 388 00:29:06,494 --> 00:29:07,411 Last one out is the loser! 389 00:29:28,557 --> 00:29:29,266 Sisi! 390 00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,226 She's a demon concubine now, idiot. 391 00:29:40,861 --> 00:29:42,529 -Let's go help! -Okay! 392 00:29:46,367 --> 00:29:47,785 Sifu, she's powerful! 393 00:29:48,119 --> 00:29:48,828 Be careful. 394 00:30:14,562 --> 00:30:16,021 Where do you think you're going? 395 00:31:07,156 --> 00:31:08,657 I can't see anything! Now what? 396 00:31:08,991 --> 00:31:09,866 Light the flares! 397 00:31:21,295 --> 00:31:22,754 Moonlight Mirror! 398 00:31:27,426 --> 00:31:28,677 Sifu, is it over? 399 00:31:29,011 --> 00:31:31,555 No, he'll be back. Get into position for the ritual. 400 00:31:31,889 --> 00:31:32,681 Alright! 401 00:31:49,865 --> 00:31:52,284 Get into position for the Treasure Mirror Ritual. 402 00:31:52,993 --> 00:31:56,746 You must not leave your position. Otherwise, the gates to Heaven will open. 403 00:31:57,081 --> 00:31:59,541 At that point, it'll be beyond our control. 404 00:32:01,377 --> 00:32:02,419 -Prepare! -Yes! 405 00:32:02,795 --> 00:32:03,545 Yes! 406 00:32:06,006 --> 00:32:06,756 Light the fire! 407 00:32:14,306 --> 00:32:15,307 Firebomb! 408 00:32:24,900 --> 00:32:25,984 Moonlight Mirrors! 409 00:32:26,735 --> 00:32:30,613 Heaven is vast and the Earth is ash. Sun, Moon, give me your enchanted light! 410 00:32:36,370 --> 00:32:37,496 Capture the demon! 411 00:32:48,966 --> 00:32:49,800 Shoot! 412 00:32:52,219 --> 00:32:53,470 Oh shit! 413 00:33:00,060 --> 00:33:01,853 Sifu, now what? 414 00:33:02,188 --> 00:33:03,939 Remain calm and stay in position! 415 00:33:09,570 --> 00:33:10,904 No! Don't leave your position! 416 00:33:18,871 --> 00:33:21,456 Sifu, help! What's happening? 417 00:33:25,127 --> 00:33:26,503 Sifu, now what? 418 00:33:28,756 --> 00:33:31,383 It's out of my hands, the gates of Heaven are open! 419 00:34:32,903 --> 00:34:35,739 Demon King, why won't you die? What are you waiting for? 420 00:34:38,367 --> 00:34:39,534 You're right on time. 421 00:34:45,291 --> 00:34:46,375 Get down! 422 00:34:49,169 --> 00:34:51,212 Hey, this isn't what the action director planned! 423 00:34:51,547 --> 00:34:52,714 I planned it. 424 00:34:55,175 --> 00:34:57,051 Hey, hey! 425 00:34:59,305 --> 00:35:00,306 There's no escape! 426 00:35:01,432 --> 00:35:02,349 Pull! 427 00:35:04,602 --> 00:35:05,352 Cut! 428 00:35:08,522 --> 00:35:10,273 Hey, are you kidding me? 429 00:35:10,608 --> 00:35:12,443 Why didn't you warn me he was going to use a real sword? 430 00:35:12,776 --> 00:35:15,153 Hey! Where's this old man from? 431 00:35:15,487 --> 00:35:16,154 Where's Monkey? 432 00:35:16,488 --> 00:35:18,406 Excuse me, I was just in the bathroom. 433 00:35:18,741 --> 00:35:19,825 Are we ready to shoot? 434 00:35:20,159 --> 00:35:21,785 You're fired! 435 00:35:22,411 --> 00:35:24,579 Hey man, at this rate, I'll never make it to the other set. 436 00:35:24,913 --> 00:35:26,164 Figure it out before you call me again. 437 00:35:27,416 --> 00:35:28,375 Oh please! 438 00:35:28,709 --> 00:35:30,585 Director, I think he stopped breathing. 439 00:35:30,919 --> 00:35:31,961 Make the call then. 440 00:35:32,296 --> 00:35:33,130 Call an ambulance? 441 00:35:33,631 --> 00:35:35,674 Call the journalists for the publicity! 442 00:35:36,300 --> 00:35:37,718 Place a camera here. 443 00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:40,095 Pick the guy up, then throw him down. 444 00:35:40,429 --> 00:35:42,389 While we have him, let's get a second shot! 445 00:35:42,890 --> 00:35:45,350 I don't know, I think she had an appointment today. 446 00:35:45,684 --> 00:35:47,894 Did you really tell Dr. Wong I called? 447 00:35:48,228 --> 00:35:50,146 -Yes, she said she's in a meeting. -A meeting? 448 00:35:50,481 --> 00:35:52,065 Why does she have so many meetings? 449 00:35:52,399 --> 00:35:53,858 You liar, I say-- 450 00:35:54,193 --> 00:35:54,985 Hello? 451 00:36:36,110 --> 00:36:40,610 X The Lord God brings true happiness X 452 00:36:46,412 --> 00:36:50,912 X May God bless your work X 453 00:36:52,626 --> 00:36:57,126 X May God bless your home K 454 00:36:57,548 --> 00:37:02,048 X May God gift you true perfection X 455 00:37:05,431 --> 00:37:09,931 X May God bless your hope X 456 00:37:11,145 --> 00:37:15,645 X May God bless your music K 457 00:37:17,192 --> 00:37:21,692 X May God bless your aspirations X 458 00:37:22,489 --> 00:37:26,989 X May God bless your -- X 459 00:37:29,413 --> 00:37:33,041 X May God bless your aspirations X 460 00:37:33,375 --> 00:37:37,875 X May God bless your joy X 461 00:37:52,019 --> 00:37:53,562 Father, what should we do? 462 00:37:53,896 --> 00:37:55,105 What.. What? 463 00:37:56,982 --> 00:37:58,358 Almighty God, 464 00:37:58,692 --> 00:38:01,319 May you please aid your believers In exorcising these demons. 465 00:38:10,037 --> 00:38:11,455 That hurts! 466 00:38:11,789 --> 00:38:12,706 Run! 467 00:38:14,082 --> 00:38:14,707 Demon! 468 00:38:15,042 --> 00:38:17,711 You are powerless in the face of an almighty God! 469 00:38:18,212 --> 00:38:19,796 It hurts! 470 00:38:23,217 --> 00:38:24,927 Run! What are you waiting for? 471 00:38:25,260 --> 00:38:27,345 Don't go! I haven't exorcised the demon! 472 00:38:27,888 --> 00:38:28,638 Now what? 473 00:38:29,515 --> 00:38:30,265 It won't open! 474 00:38:30,599 --> 00:38:33,226 Are you stupid? You'll break the door! 475 00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:34,686 Open it like that! 476 00:38:35,020 --> 00:38:36,146 -Let's go! -Thanks! 477 00:38:36,522 --> 00:38:37,397 Hey! 478 00:39:35,539 --> 00:39:37,791 (What's happening?) (Are you crazy?) 479 00:39:38,709 --> 00:39:39,751 Stop right there! 480 00:39:43,589 --> 00:39:44,506 Huh? Iron foot? 481 00:39:47,301 --> 00:39:50,429 Why are you attacking him? Are you crazy? 482 00:39:54,892 --> 00:39:56,935 Freeze, freeze! 483 00:40:01,231 --> 00:40:02,440 Where do you think you're going? 484 00:40:05,402 --> 00:40:06,903 He's insane! Lock him up! 485 00:40:07,237 --> 00:40:09,739 Who are you with? How dare you treat me like this? 486 00:40:10,073 --> 00:40:12,241 -At least he's consistently insane. -Sure is. 487 00:40:12,576 --> 00:40:15,120 We're the Hong Kong Royal Police! 488 00:40:17,998 --> 00:40:19,749 What will you do with me? 489 00:40:20,083 --> 00:40:21,084 Put you in a car! 490 00:40:21,418 --> 00:40:22,210 Let's go! 491 00:40:22,544 --> 00:40:26,005 Where are your manners? I demand to see the local official! 492 00:40:26,340 --> 00:40:27,841 Announce my arrival! 493 00:40:28,175 --> 00:40:29,593 Can you hear me? 494 00:40:36,683 --> 00:40:39,519 Father, we've no idea who those two are. They're dressed funny too. 495 00:40:39,853 --> 00:40:41,729 They won't open the door no matter how long I knock. 496 00:40:42,064 --> 00:40:44,900 And you're still feeding them? Aren't you afraid? 497 00:40:46,026 --> 00:40:48,486 Father, should we call the police? 498 00:40:49,488 --> 00:40:52,866 If our Almighty God has space in his heart for demons, 499 00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:54,576 who are we to disagree? 500 00:40:54,952 --> 00:40:57,079 The characters are so small... Bad for my eyes. 501 00:40:58,413 --> 00:40:59,831 What kind of book is this? 502 00:41:00,248 --> 00:41:02,333 I don't understand a single word. 503 00:41:02,668 --> 00:41:03,710 I give up. 504 00:41:07,506 --> 00:41:10,592 Where are we? And where is Sifu? 505 00:41:10,926 --> 00:41:11,968 I told you, 506 00:41:12,302 --> 00:41:13,970 you have a screw loose somewhere. 507 00:41:14,304 --> 00:41:16,306 We're in the Demon King's illusion. 508 00:41:17,808 --> 00:41:21,645 At this rate, even if we don't die today, we'll die tomorrow. 509 00:41:21,979 --> 00:41:23,105 You're dead already! 510 00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:25,440 You're a god! 511 00:41:25,774 --> 00:41:29,277 Gods inhale delicious smells, people eat delicious foods. 512 00:41:29,611 --> 00:41:31,195 Why would you get hungry? 513 00:41:47,796 --> 00:41:49,672 Hey little guy, you must be hungry. Eat up! 514 00:41:50,007 --> 00:41:51,466 Yeah! Eat up, eat up. 515 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,469 It's delicious! No need to be polite! Go on, take it! 516 00:42:00,934 --> 00:42:02,018 Sihing, (Senior male classmate) 517 00:42:02,352 --> 00:42:05,688 Do you know why you're so short? Because you eat alone. 518 00:42:06,023 --> 00:42:07,858 I told you gods inhale delicious smells. 519 00:42:08,191 --> 00:42:10,401 Here, I'll let you smell it, alright? 520 00:42:17,159 --> 00:42:19,327 How is it? Do you feel less hungry? 521 00:42:19,661 --> 00:42:21,537 Sihing, it's not working... 522 00:42:21,872 --> 00:42:23,331 Sorry, I guess I can't help. 523 00:42:23,665 --> 00:42:24,457 Sihing... 524 00:42:24,791 --> 00:42:26,209 I've discovered a problem. 525 00:42:26,626 --> 00:42:27,460 Go on. 526 00:42:27,753 --> 00:42:30,881 I feel it very very deeply in my body 527 00:42:31,214 --> 00:42:32,924 it's better to be a man than a god, come! 528 00:42:33,258 --> 00:42:34,425 Hey! No cheating! 529 00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:37,220 You can't eat this! Just sniff it! 530 00:42:42,893 --> 00:42:44,644 Big Brother, can we start playing yet? 531 00:42:45,145 --> 00:42:46,896 How many times do I have to tell you, 532 00:42:47,230 --> 00:42:48,606 when we play this game, call me Your Honor? 533 00:42:48,940 --> 00:42:49,815 Sorry, Big Brother! 534 00:42:50,150 --> 00:42:51,025 Your Honor! 535 00:42:51,735 --> 00:42:53,528 I won't do it again, Big Brother! 536 00:42:54,738 --> 00:42:56,448 SECRETARY, JUDGE, PROSECUTOR 537 00:42:58,158 --> 00:42:59,075 DEFENSE LAWYER 538 00:42:59,409 --> 00:43:01,411 Don't worry, I can help you. 539 00:43:02,954 --> 00:43:05,122 What's his crime? 540 00:43:06,875 --> 00:43:09,711 I heard he caused a public disturbance at the hospital. 541 00:43:10,045 --> 00:43:11,296 It's a serious offense! 542 00:43:13,090 --> 00:43:15,342 Earhustle, well done. 543 00:43:15,675 --> 00:43:16,759 Take a sip. 544 00:43:17,094 --> 00:43:18,470 Thank you, Your Honor! 545 00:43:20,263 --> 00:43:23,641 I hereby charge you with 546 00:43:24,351 --> 00:43:26,603 instigating unrest... 547 00:43:27,104 --> 00:43:29,815 Instigating unrest! Do you plead guilty? 548 00:43:34,444 --> 00:43:36,028 Silence means you're pleading guilty! 549 00:43:36,363 --> 00:43:38,490 I sentence you to death! How does that sound to you? 550 00:43:40,117 --> 00:43:42,702 No opinion? Really no opinion? 551 00:43:43,036 --> 00:43:44,328 Execution! 552 00:43:44,955 --> 00:43:45,872 DECAPITATE 553 00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:59,594 I'm so sorry, I couldn't help you. 554 00:44:09,020 --> 00:44:12,648 Big brother! The Demoness is here! 555 00:44:14,818 --> 00:44:16,945 Mission Demon Hunting! 556 00:44:17,612 --> 00:44:19,071 Pretend to be asleep! 557 00:44:24,786 --> 00:44:25,828 I'm asleep. 558 00:44:54,649 --> 00:44:56,817 Miss Sisi! You're alive! 559 00:44:57,152 --> 00:44:59,320 How do you feel? It's nap time right now. 560 00:44:59,654 --> 00:45:00,571 You're not Sisi. 561 00:45:01,156 --> 00:45:02,448 You're the Demon King's concubine. 562 00:45:02,782 --> 00:45:04,700 And now I am enchanted by your magic. 563 00:45:05,035 --> 00:45:05,994 I have nothing to say. 564 00:45:06,328 --> 00:45:08,413 Kill me if you must, there's nothing to say. 565 00:45:08,747 --> 00:45:11,750 I'm not a demon's concubine. and even if I were, I wouldn't kill you. 566 00:45:12,083 --> 00:45:14,627 Now, will you be a good boy and take a nice nap? 567 00:45:14,961 --> 00:45:16,128 Dr. Wong! 568 00:45:16,504 --> 00:45:18,589 Dr. Wong, Dr. Wong! 569 00:45:18,924 --> 00:45:20,383 Your precious patients 570 00:45:20,717 --> 00:45:22,552 keep taking apart my mops! 571 00:45:22,886 --> 00:45:24,679 How am I supposed to do my job!? 572 00:45:25,013 --> 00:45:28,349 Ma'am, I'll tell my supervisors. Just clean up their room first. 573 00:45:30,727 --> 00:45:34,188 So what if you tell them... it doesn't help clean the floors. 574 00:45:39,611 --> 00:45:40,987 So your name is Cho Lo! 575 00:45:41,321 --> 00:45:44,032 You're such a brave warrior! 576 00:45:47,494 --> 00:45:49,662 Take a sip! 577 00:45:52,332 --> 00:45:54,083 From now on, we're brothers. 578 00:45:54,417 --> 00:45:55,251 Yeah! Good brothers! 579 00:45:55,585 --> 00:45:57,795 Let's form a blood alliance when we have a spare moment. 580 00:45:58,546 --> 00:46:00,005 What era are we in? 581 00:46:00,382 --> 00:46:01,466 Who are you people? 582 00:46:03,051 --> 00:46:04,469 Let me answer your first question. 583 00:46:04,803 --> 00:46:07,430 -It's now... -1991. 584 00:46:07,847 --> 00:46:08,764 It's 1991! 585 00:46:09,099 --> 00:46:11,351 So six more years before we emigrate! 586 00:46:13,603 --> 00:46:15,521 And now, for the second question. 587 00:46:15,855 --> 00:46:17,314 You and I are the same kind of people. 588 00:46:17,649 --> 00:46:20,818 But the crazy people outside say we're insane! 589 00:46:21,319 --> 00:46:22,445 Who's the emperor now? 590 00:46:24,364 --> 00:46:25,323 Jiang... 591 00:46:25,657 --> 00:46:26,699 Jiang Zemin! 592 00:46:27,325 --> 00:46:28,242 Jiang Zemin? 593 00:46:29,286 --> 00:46:31,162 Not Li Shimin? 594 00:46:31,496 --> 00:46:32,413 Simon Li? 595 00:46:32,747 --> 00:46:34,290 He's been dead for a thousand years! 596 00:46:36,793 --> 00:46:39,003 Have you seen my two students? Have you seen them? 597 00:46:39,337 --> 00:46:39,837 Students? 598 00:46:40,171 --> 00:46:41,547 You have two students? 599 00:46:41,881 --> 00:46:43,299 WHERE ARE YOU? 600 00:46:46,928 --> 00:46:48,930 Be quiet! He's doing a transfiguration! 601 00:46:59,566 --> 00:47:00,900 Brother Cho Lo! 602 00:47:01,234 --> 00:47:02,944 You're trained in the dark arts? 603 00:47:03,278 --> 00:47:05,613 Nonsense! Taoism and the dark arts are in an eternal battle. 604 00:47:05,947 --> 00:47:07,281 This is not magic. It's Taoism. 605 00:47:07,615 --> 00:47:08,616 Taoism? 606 00:47:22,756 --> 00:47:26,468 To starve like this... 607 00:47:26,801 --> 00:47:28,636 even a snake would die. 608 00:47:38,355 --> 00:47:39,773 Roasted pigeon? 609 00:47:49,074 --> 00:47:50,075 I told you you're a god. 610 00:47:50,408 --> 00:47:51,283 Gods inhale delicious smells. 611 00:47:51,618 --> 00:47:52,994 You don't have to eat, give it to me. 612 00:47:54,996 --> 00:47:57,039 How dare you steal my pigeon! 613 00:47:57,749 --> 00:48:00,334 God, god, god... Haven't you heard of the God of Cookery? 614 00:48:04,923 --> 00:48:07,467 You're in trouble now! This is Sifu's courier pigeon! 615 00:48:07,801 --> 00:48:08,468 Hand it over! 616 00:48:09,844 --> 00:48:11,178 Where art thou? 617 00:48:12,222 --> 00:48:13,723 Cult leader, cult leader, 618 00:48:14,057 --> 00:48:14,766 cult leader? 619 00:48:15,642 --> 00:48:16,601 Cult leader! 620 00:48:22,107 --> 00:48:22,982 Cult leader! 621 00:48:23,316 --> 00:48:25,484 Little man, you can't call me that. 622 00:48:25,819 --> 00:48:28,071 You may call me Father. 623 00:48:28,405 --> 00:48:29,197 Flower? 624 00:48:29,739 --> 00:48:31,949 A man named Flower? Who cares! 625 00:48:32,283 --> 00:48:34,535 May I ask where we are? 626 00:48:34,869 --> 00:48:36,745 This is the Lord's house. 627 00:48:39,958 --> 00:48:42,293 The Lord's house? 628 00:48:42,627 --> 00:48:45,004 Flower must have meant their lord's house! 629 00:48:45,338 --> 00:48:48,382 SIFU, WE WAIT AT THE LORD'S HOUSE. 630 00:48:56,891 --> 00:48:57,933 It's not working... 631 00:49:02,021 --> 00:49:03,814 Thankfully no one saw that... 632 00:49:04,149 --> 00:49:05,483 that'd be so embarrassing... 633 00:49:05,817 --> 00:49:07,276 I'd be done for! 634 00:49:17,370 --> 00:49:18,496 Fire! 635 00:49:22,959 --> 00:49:24,168 What? Never seen this? 636 00:49:24,502 --> 00:49:26,462 Of course not! 637 00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:28,214 Look, Father! 638 00:49:28,715 --> 00:49:30,842 Oh my God! 639 00:49:32,177 --> 00:49:33,887 Where's my collector's edition! 640 00:49:34,220 --> 00:49:35,346 Is it this one? 641 00:49:38,016 --> 00:49:38,850 Oh no! 642 00:49:39,184 --> 00:49:40,977 My one comic book is done for! 643 00:49:41,352 --> 00:49:42,728 Serves you right for reading that trash! 644 00:49:43,062 --> 00:49:44,354 What happened? 645 00:49:47,525 --> 00:49:48,484 Is that really okay? 646 00:49:48,818 --> 00:49:50,152 Of course it's not okay! 647 00:49:51,154 --> 00:49:52,196 You're no longer welcome here! 648 00:49:54,449 --> 00:49:56,117 Yummy yummy in my tummy, 649 00:49:56,451 --> 00:49:58,119 none for the puppy next to me. 650 00:49:58,453 --> 00:50:01,289 Sidai, Sidai, let's share! (junior male classmate) 651 00:50:01,623 --> 00:50:03,374 You can have it if you can reach it! 652 00:50:03,708 --> 00:50:04,959 Hey, hey! 653 00:50:05,293 --> 00:50:06,877 You're awful, why won't you hand it over! 654 00:50:07,212 --> 00:50:08,129 Hey, hey! 655 00:50:25,355 --> 00:50:26,856 You were eaten by Ma Sheung Fung? 656 00:50:34,531 --> 00:50:36,199 Where are those two? 657 00:50:38,117 --> 00:50:40,828 What shoddy work... Looks nothing like a pigeon. 658 00:50:50,838 --> 00:50:52,548 Their lord's house? 659 00:50:52,882 --> 00:50:54,925 Could the two be with the Emperor? 660 00:51:08,147 --> 00:51:09,231 I'm superman! 661 00:51:09,566 --> 00:51:10,358 Let's go. 662 00:51:10,984 --> 00:51:11,609 Walk! 663 00:51:11,943 --> 00:51:14,028 -Superman has to fly! -Hey, stop! 664 00:51:14,612 --> 00:51:15,571 Stop! 665 00:51:47,437 --> 00:51:49,021 Nurse-on-duty! 666 00:51:49,355 --> 00:51:51,648 Please admit the patient at the main gate! 667 00:51:57,822 --> 00:51:59,782 How could they ask us to admit a patient at this hour? 668 00:52:00,116 --> 00:52:01,909 -Exactly! -Ludicrous! 669 00:52:02,243 --> 00:52:03,827 We need to rest too! 670 00:52:12,086 --> 00:52:13,295 Here comes superman! 671 00:52:13,630 --> 00:52:15,048 Where you off to? 672 00:52:15,882 --> 00:52:19,760 You're dressed nicely... How did you know we were having a party? 673 00:52:20,094 --> 00:52:21,637 Do you know where the Emperor lives? 674 00:52:23,264 --> 00:52:25,641 I know, in the Mediterranean Sea! 675 00:52:25,975 --> 00:52:28,185 -And where's that? -I can take you there, alright? 676 00:52:28,519 --> 00:52:30,020 HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIG BROTHER 677 00:52:31,147 --> 00:52:33,691 Brother Cho Lo, we've been waiting so long for you! 678 00:52:34,025 --> 00:52:34,984 This is it? 679 00:52:35,318 --> 00:52:37,486 There's orange, there's green, and we're the ocean! 680 00:52:37,945 --> 00:52:38,695 Brother Cho Lo, 681 00:52:39,030 --> 00:52:41,574 welcome to our ball! 682 00:52:41,908 --> 00:52:44,327 Let's dance! Party! 683 00:52:47,914 --> 00:52:50,207 They're all crazy! 684 00:52:54,253 --> 00:52:55,504 Illusion box? 685 00:52:57,423 --> 00:52:59,800 Demon King, you've finally revealed yourself! 686 00:53:00,593 --> 00:53:02,595 Let's play Tug-of-War! 687 00:53:02,929 --> 00:53:03,930 Yeah! 688 00:53:04,263 --> 00:53:06,848 Tug-of-War! 689 00:53:07,684 --> 00:53:09,769 Hey! He can play the accordion! 690 00:53:32,542 --> 00:53:34,794 Big Brother, this Taoist geezer is amazing! 691 00:53:35,128 --> 00:53:39,006 What Taoist geezer? He's now our Big-Big Brother! 692 00:53:39,340 --> 00:53:40,507 Hey! What are you doing? 693 00:53:40,842 --> 00:53:43,052 The riot police are here! Scary, scary! 694 00:53:44,595 --> 00:53:45,846 The riot police! 695 00:53:46,180 --> 00:53:46,722 Scary! 696 00:53:47,849 --> 00:53:50,518 Until now, we still don't know who you are. 697 00:53:51,477 --> 00:53:53,645 We only know you're a stuntman. 698 00:53:55,982 --> 00:53:57,608 Why do you look at me like that? 699 00:53:58,860 --> 00:54:03,360 I told you, I'm not a demon's concubine. Nor am I Sisi. My name is Gigi. 700 00:54:07,452 --> 00:54:10,329 I'm a psychiatrist here. I will do my best to help you. 701 00:54:18,045 --> 00:54:21,548 Since we're cut from the same cloth, why keep me tied up? 702 00:54:21,883 --> 00:54:24,510 Don't worry, they'll let you go soon enough. 703 00:54:24,844 --> 00:54:26,220 No need to be so afraid. 704 00:54:29,056 --> 00:54:30,098 You... 705 00:54:30,433 --> 00:54:32,143 Do you really hate TV? 706 00:54:32,477 --> 00:54:34,562 Or do you hate the image? 707 00:54:42,653 --> 00:54:43,862 Illusion box? 708 00:55:24,028 --> 00:55:25,112 Come down! 709 00:55:25,446 --> 00:55:27,156 That's dangerous! 710 00:55:27,490 --> 00:55:28,657 Come down now! 711 00:55:39,544 --> 00:55:41,587 Are you alright? Here's let's get you up. 712 00:55:48,886 --> 00:55:50,762 If you're not a demon, then you're Sisi. 713 00:55:51,097 --> 00:55:53,307 But when did you achieve this level of Tao? 714 00:55:53,641 --> 00:55:56,852 With a mere wave of your hand, you were able to 715 00:55:57,228 --> 00:55:59,480 summon and dismiss the Demon King. 716 00:56:01,065 --> 00:56:02,566 Actually, I'd also like to know 717 00:56:02,900 --> 00:56:06,028 why do you sometimes called me "Sisi" and sometimes a demon? 718 00:56:06,362 --> 00:56:08,405 Can you tell me? - Of course. 719 00:56:27,466 --> 00:56:29,301 -Oh, it's you. -Yes. 720 00:56:29,677 --> 00:56:31,387 Big-Big Brother. 721 00:56:31,721 --> 00:56:32,972 Greet him! 722 00:56:33,764 --> 00:56:36,892 -Big-Big Brother... -Rise. 723 00:56:37,226 --> 00:56:38,894 Just call me Taoist Geezer. 724 00:56:39,228 --> 00:56:41,855 Brother Cho Lo, I thought you were going to rescue your students? 725 00:56:42,189 --> 00:56:44,191 We came to save you! 726 00:56:44,525 --> 00:56:46,360 We brought your belongings. 727 00:56:47,403 --> 00:56:48,153 Thank you. 728 00:56:48,487 --> 00:56:50,030 Big Brother, there's no one here! 729 00:56:53,534 --> 00:56:55,661 Of course there's no one. Even a crazy person could tell. 730 00:56:55,995 --> 00:57:00,495 Big-Big Brother, you better get going. The gate is that way. 731 00:57:01,167 --> 00:57:04,503 Yeah, or it'll be too late! 732 00:57:05,630 --> 00:57:06,464 Brothers, 733 00:57:06,797 --> 00:57:10,550 once I have found my two students, I will be back to rescue you. 734 00:57:13,095 --> 00:57:14,679 Please don't! 735 00:57:15,014 --> 00:57:16,515 Scary, scary! 736 00:57:17,183 --> 00:57:21,683 People out there are crazier than we are! 737 00:57:22,229 --> 00:57:26,729 It's dangerous out there! Here, take this. 738 00:57:27,151 --> 00:57:31,238 Yeah, with this, you don't need to fold courier pigeons anymore! 739 00:57:31,572 --> 00:57:32,573 Yeah! 740 00:57:33,199 --> 00:57:35,826 It's too great a gift. I bid you goodbye. 741 00:57:36,911 --> 00:57:37,828 Adieu! 742 00:57:43,834 --> 00:57:45,085 Goodbye! 743 00:57:45,419 --> 00:57:46,253 Goodbye! 744 00:57:46,587 --> 00:57:49,298 -Take care. -Take care! 745 00:57:51,300 --> 00:57:54,261 - Brother Keung, please open the gate. - Sure thing, why are you so late? 746 00:57:54,595 --> 00:57:56,847 - Have you had your midnight snack? - Yeah! 747 00:58:00,726 --> 00:58:02,144 -Thank you! -No worries. 748 00:58:13,864 --> 00:58:15,782 Hey, Gigi, why so late tonight? 749 00:58:16,117 --> 00:58:17,576 I was planing on leaving earlier, 750 00:58:17,910 --> 00:58:20,162 but I ended up speaking with a patient for a very long time. 751 00:58:20,496 --> 00:58:22,664 Gigi, your trunk isn't closed. 752 00:58:22,999 --> 00:58:25,001 Get home safe, goodnight! 753 00:58:25,376 --> 00:58:26,627 Thanks, goodnight. 754 00:58:27,878 --> 00:58:29,129 What's wrong with tonight... 755 00:59:01,871 --> 00:59:03,914 Miss, your license please. 756 00:59:10,713 --> 00:59:12,005 Miss, may I take a look? 757 00:59:12,381 --> 00:59:13,131 Sure. 758 00:59:17,303 --> 00:59:18,220 The puppy is pretty cute! 759 00:59:19,472 --> 00:59:20,473 It's just a cheap mongrel. 760 00:59:20,806 --> 00:59:21,640 Still pretty cute. 761 00:59:28,314 --> 00:59:29,565 Not bad... 762 00:59:29,899 --> 00:59:32,067 How did you get in here without me knowing? 763 00:59:34,070 --> 00:59:36,655 Since you're such a good boy... I'll take you home. 764 00:59:45,498 --> 00:59:48,083 Good boy, stay. 765 01:00:02,598 --> 01:00:03,599 Puppy, 766 01:00:04,809 --> 01:00:05,726 Good boy. 767 01:00:08,020 --> 01:00:08,895 Good boy... 768 01:00:12,483 --> 01:00:16,111 Gigi, it's Dr. Leung. I read your report. 769 01:00:16,445 --> 01:00:19,531 According to the information from Psychiatry, there may be some issues. 770 01:00:19,865 --> 01:00:22,492 Let's let the Dean decide when we meet. 771 01:00:24,662 --> 01:00:26,246 Gigi, it's Ah Ying. 772 01:00:26,580 --> 01:00:30,292 Don't forget we have a meeting with Dr. Cheung at 7p.m. this Friday. 773 01:00:31,085 --> 01:00:33,962 Gigi, I know you're hiding from me. 774 01:00:34,296 --> 01:00:37,090 You won't answer when I call the hospital. 775 01:00:37,424 --> 01:00:39,259 Your resistance is futile. Let me tell you-- 776 01:01:20,176 --> 01:01:23,137 No! What are you doing? Let me go! 777 01:01:24,305 --> 01:01:25,431 No! 778 01:01:27,266 --> 01:01:30,727 I used to love playing with you like this! 779 01:01:31,061 --> 01:01:32,771 And now you won't even kiss me back! 780 01:01:40,696 --> 01:01:41,697 Gigi! 781 01:01:44,450 --> 01:01:45,742 Did I scare you? 782 01:01:46,785 --> 01:01:48,119 Here's a flower for you. 783 01:02:00,382 --> 01:02:02,842 Gigi, you know I've never stopped loving you. 784 01:02:03,177 --> 01:02:04,553 How many times do I have to tell you, 785 01:02:04,929 --> 01:02:06,263 we're through! 786 01:02:06,597 --> 01:02:08,473 I no longer love you! 787 01:02:08,807 --> 01:02:10,350 Stop tormenting me! 788 01:02:10,684 --> 01:02:13,144 You're lying! I know you still love me! 789 01:02:13,646 --> 01:02:15,147 I know I was a little crazy before... 790 01:02:15,481 --> 01:02:16,398 but I can change! 791 01:02:16,732 --> 01:02:19,484 Believe me, marry me. Come back to me. 792 01:02:20,486 --> 01:02:21,445 Gigi! 793 01:02:45,177 --> 01:02:46,178 Are you crazy? 794 01:02:47,888 --> 01:02:49,139 You like hitting? 795 01:02:49,848 --> 01:02:50,849 Keep hitting! 796 01:02:51,350 --> 01:02:52,142 Go on! 797 01:02:52,768 --> 01:02:53,560 No! 798 01:03:08,867 --> 01:03:10,910 You fucking dog, I'm going to kill you! 799 01:03:14,915 --> 01:03:15,874 What the...? 800 01:03:18,335 --> 01:03:19,210 Stop following me! 801 01:03:37,146 --> 01:03:40,065 I can't believe you saved me. Thank you. 802 01:03:41,525 --> 01:03:44,861 Drink some milk first. I'll be right back. 803 01:03:52,995 --> 01:03:55,455 Hey, look at you! 804 01:03:55,789 --> 01:03:58,124 You're covered in milk! 805 01:04:01,503 --> 01:04:06,003 What a good puppy... Let me clean you up. 806 01:04:17,353 --> 01:04:18,312 Come-- 807 01:04:19,188 --> 01:04:20,856 Let me clean you up. 808 01:04:24,443 --> 01:04:25,652 What a silly puppy... 809 01:04:37,414 --> 01:04:38,248 Help! 810 01:04:38,582 --> 01:04:40,500 Miss, I didn't mean to scare you! 811 01:04:41,502 --> 01:04:42,419 Miss! 812 01:04:44,213 --> 01:04:48,258 -Miss, everything I told you today is true. -Leave! I don't want to hear it! 813 01:04:48,592 --> 01:04:50,594 I escaped from the hospital to find my two students. 814 01:04:50,928 --> 01:04:53,055 I don't want them to be caught by the Demon King. 815 01:04:53,389 --> 01:04:54,598 Please believe me. 816 01:04:54,932 --> 01:04:56,975 Leave, leave! 817 01:04:57,434 --> 01:04:58,893 Alright, I'll leave. 818 01:05:05,275 --> 01:05:06,484 I'm leaving! 819 01:05:10,114 --> 01:05:11,740 I'm returning your jade amulet. 820 01:05:13,409 --> 01:05:15,077 I left it on the table. 821 01:05:38,684 --> 01:05:41,103 In your past life, your name was Sisi. 822 01:05:41,437 --> 01:05:43,439 Hailing from Sika County. 823 01:05:43,772 --> 01:05:47,066 You were forced to marry the Demon King. 824 01:05:47,401 --> 01:05:50,362 The Demon King killed both your parents. 825 01:05:50,696 --> 01:05:55,196 In exchange for the safety of the entire county, you agreed to marry him. 826 01:05:56,118 --> 01:05:58,453 Your attempt to murder him failed. 827 01:05:58,787 --> 01:06:02,999 He stole your soul, and ultimately, you became his demonic concubine. 828 01:06:20,809 --> 01:06:22,435 You've been here all night? 829 01:06:22,936 --> 01:06:26,314 I had planned on leaving, but then it rained all night. 830 01:06:27,483 --> 01:06:28,984 Your voice is cracked. 831 01:06:30,110 --> 01:06:31,152 Yes, well... 832 01:06:31,487 --> 01:06:32,696 I barked all night. 833 01:06:34,990 --> 01:06:36,783 Why didn't you come up to get out of the rain? 834 01:06:37,367 --> 01:06:38,284 That's improper, 835 01:06:39,536 --> 01:06:43,164 Men and women should keep a distance. 836 01:06:45,167 --> 01:06:47,043 I'm sorry about last night. 837 01:06:47,836 --> 01:06:48,920 It's fine. 838 01:06:52,007 --> 01:06:53,925 Why are there so many paper cranes on the ground? 839 01:06:54,259 --> 01:06:57,804 It's my method of communicating with my students. 840 01:06:59,431 --> 01:07:02,767 But my powers are useless in the rain. 841 01:07:03,435 --> 01:07:07,147 Oh, yes. Their last message said they were at the local lord's residence. 842 01:07:07,481 --> 01:07:09,441 Do you know where the local lord lives? 843 01:07:10,275 --> 01:07:11,609 The lord's residence? 844 01:07:12,569 --> 01:07:16,155 Let me ask around, I'll help you look. 845 01:07:16,490 --> 01:07:18,950 Oh yes, they're looking for you. 846 01:07:19,284 --> 01:07:23,496 You better stay at mine today. Do you know how to use my keys? 847 01:07:23,830 --> 01:07:26,123 -Yes, I saw you use it. -It's this one. 848 01:07:27,626 --> 01:07:29,085 I have to get to the hospital. 849 01:07:34,633 --> 01:07:36,843 Hey! Why are you still standing around? 850 01:07:37,177 --> 01:07:39,929 I promise to help you look for your students tonight, okay? 851 01:07:42,891 --> 01:07:43,933 Okay! 852 01:07:52,276 --> 01:07:56,113 Your transfiguration skills suck! You've been at it all day, and nothing flies. 853 01:07:56,446 --> 01:08:00,825 Hey, it's still early! I'm still your sihing, show some respect! 854 01:08:01,159 --> 01:08:03,452 Sihing? What a load of crap! 855 01:08:04,538 --> 01:08:08,333 If it weren't for the rain every single one of them would fly! 856 01:08:10,752 --> 01:08:13,671 A bad workman blames his tools! 857 01:08:14,006 --> 01:08:15,632 That phrase was made for you! 858 01:08:15,966 --> 01:08:19,803 Don't you know our powers don't work in the rain!? 859 01:08:20,137 --> 01:08:21,012 Get it? 860 01:08:21,346 --> 01:08:23,598 -Sihing, are you done? -Yes. 861 01:08:23,932 --> 01:08:28,269 Good, because I'm hungrier than a dead dog. I beg you, save me! 862 01:08:28,604 --> 01:08:29,730 "Sihing" 863 01:08:32,482 --> 01:08:34,442 Namo Amitabha? 864 01:08:35,527 --> 01:08:36,945 I've got a plan! 865 01:08:49,249 --> 01:08:51,251 At home, you rely on your brothers. 866 01:08:51,710 --> 01:08:54,462 Out in the world, you rely on your friends! 867 01:08:56,089 --> 01:08:59,342 Today, we have journeyed into your fair town 868 01:08:59,676 --> 01:09:02,387 seeking nothing but two small meals. 869 01:09:02,721 --> 01:09:05,098 We're just warming up! 870 01:09:05,432 --> 01:09:07,308 We've saved the best for last. 871 01:09:09,019 --> 01:09:10,937 Why is he lying down? 872 01:09:14,816 --> 01:09:16,526 Can he even lift that slab? 873 01:09:17,819 --> 01:09:19,028 Get off. 874 01:09:22,908 --> 01:09:24,826 This strongman is more like it! 875 01:09:26,995 --> 01:09:28,037 He's all red! 876 01:09:28,955 --> 01:09:30,581 Can he really handle it? 877 01:09:30,916 --> 01:09:32,250 Don't kill anyone! 878 01:09:35,253 --> 01:09:37,255 He can't even lift the hammer! 879 01:09:48,809 --> 01:09:50,060 Get shit! 880 01:09:52,020 --> 01:09:53,062 Lie down! 881 01:09:57,442 --> 01:09:59,318 Be careful, Sidai! 882 01:10:00,028 --> 01:10:01,529 No charge if I don't break it in one go! 883 01:10:01,863 --> 01:10:02,822 Let's see this! 884 01:10:03,615 --> 01:10:04,824 Sidai! 885 01:10:07,160 --> 01:10:08,286 How's that!? 886 01:10:08,620 --> 01:10:11,039 Thank you, thank you. Awesome! 887 01:10:11,373 --> 01:10:12,707 We won't be hungry again! 888 01:10:13,041 --> 01:10:14,083 Thank you, thank you. 889 01:10:14,418 --> 01:10:16,128 Cops, cops! 890 01:10:16,461 --> 01:10:20,214 Stop right there! 891 01:10:29,266 --> 01:10:30,267 One more... 892 01:10:31,101 --> 01:10:32,769 Hey! What are you doing? Putting on a big show? 893 01:10:33,103 --> 01:10:34,187 Get up! 894 01:10:35,814 --> 01:10:37,899 Just busking for our next meal... 895 01:10:38,233 --> 01:10:40,276 Busking? Arrest him! 896 01:10:42,404 --> 01:10:43,321 Let's go! 897 01:10:44,364 --> 01:10:44,947 Get up! 898 01:10:45,282 --> 01:10:47,450 Let go of me! 899 01:10:50,954 --> 01:10:52,872 Over, over! Backup, backup! 900 01:10:53,206 --> 01:10:54,749 Backup? 901 01:11:00,380 --> 01:11:01,547 Who are you people? 902 01:11:04,259 --> 01:11:05,093 Are you alright? 903 01:11:05,427 --> 01:11:06,219 Let's go. 904 01:11:06,553 --> 01:11:09,055 Paper money is useless, only silver coins count! 905 01:11:11,475 --> 01:11:14,519 Money! 906 01:11:14,853 --> 01:11:15,728 Move! 907 01:11:22,694 --> 01:11:23,945 Sifu... 908 01:11:24,279 --> 01:11:27,740 Stop... your whining Is driving me crazy. 909 01:11:28,074 --> 01:11:31,202 -Sifu... -I'm taking you to sifu now. 910 01:11:31,536 --> 01:11:32,662 Are you crazy? 911 01:11:33,580 --> 01:11:35,957 Excuse me, where is the Green Waters Insane Asylum? 912 01:11:36,291 --> 01:11:37,917 You're going the right way, you certainly belong there! 913 01:11:38,251 --> 01:11:38,960 Oh, uh, thanks. 914 01:12:28,260 --> 01:12:31,388 Gigi, I am now officially proposing to you. 915 01:12:31,930 --> 01:12:33,181 Gigi, Gigi! 916 01:12:48,989 --> 01:12:50,031 For you! 917 01:12:51,533 --> 01:12:52,158 Ben-- 918 01:12:52,492 --> 01:12:54,035 Please let me go, alright? 919 01:12:54,369 --> 01:12:55,244 Let you go? 920 01:12:56,746 --> 01:12:57,830 No! 921 01:13:08,925 --> 01:13:10,801 No need to run, you won't get away! 922 01:13:11,344 --> 01:13:13,220 I'll find you even at the ends of the earth! 923 01:13:29,321 --> 01:13:30,613 You're back. 924 01:13:31,239 --> 01:13:32,823 Why are you dressed like that? 925 01:13:33,909 --> 01:13:35,660 My clothes were wet. 926 01:13:37,746 --> 01:13:38,955 You turned on the television? 927 01:13:39,289 --> 01:13:42,333 Yes. I had seen you turn on the illusion box, so I knew how. 928 01:13:46,171 --> 01:13:48,047 And you had the milk? 929 01:13:48,381 --> 01:13:51,300 Yes, I had some last night, and it was pretty good. 930 01:13:51,801 --> 01:13:55,971 You're a smart, ancient man. You picked everything up so quickly. 931 01:13:57,974 --> 01:13:58,891 Oh yes, 932 01:13:59,225 --> 01:14:02,269 On my way home, I think I saw your two students on the highway. 933 01:14:02,604 --> 01:14:04,689 Really? How did you recognise them? 934 01:14:05,023 --> 01:14:07,525 By their clothing and behavior... just as you said. 935 01:14:07,859 --> 01:14:08,734 You really saw them? 936 01:14:09,069 --> 01:14:10,779 -Come, let's go find them. -No. 937 01:14:11,237 --> 01:14:12,529 I can't let them see me like this. 938 01:14:24,709 --> 01:14:25,876 I don't see them. 939 01:14:26,962 --> 01:14:29,339 I saw them around here. 940 01:14:29,673 --> 01:14:31,007 Let's go look over there. 941 01:14:38,014 --> 01:14:39,432 They're over there! 942 01:14:39,933 --> 01:14:42,310 It's very hard to get there. 943 01:14:44,479 --> 01:14:45,730 Hey, what are you doing? 944 01:14:46,398 --> 01:14:47,107 Hey! 945 01:14:54,990 --> 01:14:57,200 You think you can do anything just because it's for the movies? 946 01:15:03,039 --> 01:15:04,373 Little Turtle! Fung! 947 01:15:19,139 --> 01:15:20,098 Little Turtle! Fung! 948 01:15:20,598 --> 01:15:21,432 Fung! 949 01:15:24,436 --> 01:15:25,395 Sifu? 950 01:15:26,062 --> 01:15:28,022 -Sifu! -Little Turtle! 951 01:15:28,356 --> 01:15:29,315 It's really sifu! 952 01:15:29,941 --> 01:15:30,900 Sifu! 953 01:15:31,276 --> 01:15:32,193 Sifu! 954 01:15:34,029 --> 01:15:35,030 Sifu! 955 01:15:35,363 --> 01:15:36,364 Sifu! 956 01:15:36,698 --> 01:15:39,867 Sifu, where have you been? I thought we'd never see you again! 957 01:15:40,201 --> 01:15:41,285 Are you alright? 958 01:15:41,619 --> 01:15:42,870 We're fine, we're fine. 959 01:15:43,663 --> 01:15:44,747 Of course we're fine, sifu! 960 01:15:45,081 --> 01:15:48,709 We've been tired and hungry, it's nice to be carried. 961 01:15:49,419 --> 01:15:51,629 -You lied to me! -Watch yourself! Sifu is here! 962 01:15:51,963 --> 01:15:53,881 My arms are numb from carrying you! 963 01:15:54,215 --> 01:15:55,925 How could you! 964 01:15:56,259 --> 01:15:59,178 You're wasting your energy fighting each other? 965 01:15:59,512 --> 01:16:01,222 The two of you are useless. I'm leaving. 966 01:16:01,681 --> 01:16:02,932 Sifu, don't leave! 967 01:16:03,266 --> 01:16:04,100 Sifu! 968 01:16:05,226 --> 01:16:06,393 Sifu, don't leave! 969 01:16:06,728 --> 01:16:07,562 Wait for me! 970 01:16:07,896 --> 01:16:08,938 You stupid carriage! 971 01:16:09,731 --> 01:16:11,399 Sifu, sifu! Don't go! 972 01:16:11,733 --> 01:16:12,734 Sifu, sifu! 973 01:16:13,068 --> 01:16:13,735 Don't go! 974 01:16:14,069 --> 01:16:16,738 If you leave, we'll never find you! Sifu, I promise to behave. 975 01:16:19,783 --> 01:16:22,160 Sifu, I'll be good, forgive me. 976 01:16:22,494 --> 01:16:23,286 Don't cry. 977 01:16:28,625 --> 01:16:29,500 Fung! 978 01:16:29,834 --> 01:16:31,252 Where do you think you're going? 979 01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:36,340 I'm happy you two are reunited. 980 01:16:36,674 --> 01:16:39,677 But how long can ghosts and humans stay together? I should take my leave. 981 01:16:40,011 --> 01:16:41,220 Sifu, I did as you said, 982 01:16:41,554 --> 01:16:43,556 I didn't tell him anything! 983 01:16:44,140 --> 01:16:45,349 God, you're so stupid. 984 01:16:45,683 --> 01:16:47,017 Gods can ride the clouds, 985 01:16:47,352 --> 01:16:48,561 so why are you walking like a lost dog? 986 01:16:48,895 --> 01:16:51,355 Also, you ate my courier pigeon! 987 01:16:51,689 --> 01:16:52,648 So I'm not dead? 988 01:16:52,982 --> 01:16:53,857 I'm human? 989 01:16:55,151 --> 01:16:56,443 I'm really human! 990 01:17:04,953 --> 01:17:06,037 Let go! 991 01:17:08,957 --> 01:17:09,916 Let go of me! 992 01:17:10,250 --> 01:17:11,292 Let go of me! 993 01:17:12,127 --> 01:17:13,795 Relax, relax! 994 01:17:14,796 --> 01:17:15,588 Hey! 995 01:17:19,425 --> 01:17:20,717 The Demon's concubine! 996 01:17:21,052 --> 01:17:22,261 Demon's concubine? That's Sisi! 997 01:17:22,595 --> 01:17:23,429 -She's a demon! -It's Si-- 998 01:17:23,763 --> 01:17:25,055 She's neither. She's Miss Gigi. 999 01:17:25,390 --> 01:17:26,474 She's in danger, let's go. 1000 01:17:26,808 --> 01:17:28,601 Sifu, go where though? 1001 01:17:35,024 --> 01:17:35,733 Sifu-- 1002 01:17:36,401 --> 01:17:36,943 What's this? 1003 01:17:37,277 --> 01:17:39,070 A Lighter. Stole it when I was roasting the pigeon. 1004 01:17:39,404 --> 01:17:40,446 It's super useful. 1005 01:17:44,325 --> 01:17:45,701 See? 1006 01:17:48,830 --> 01:17:50,832 -Hey, it's the lord's house! -The lord's house? 1007 01:17:51,166 --> 01:17:52,208 -Yes. -Then let's go! 1008 01:17:52,542 --> 01:17:54,460 -Sifu, you know how to get there? -We'll ask for directions. 1009 01:17:54,794 --> 01:17:57,922 Sifu, you're outdated. We can ask for a ride. Hail a cab! 1010 01:18:09,350 --> 01:18:11,226 Don't look at me like that. 1011 01:18:12,270 --> 01:18:14,647 I will melt in your loving gaze. 1012 01:18:22,447 --> 01:18:23,614 Don't move... 1013 01:18:27,035 --> 01:18:28,995 You are my princess. 1014 01:18:29,495 --> 01:18:31,288 Princess Chang-ping... 1015 01:18:31,873 --> 01:18:33,291 Let me go! 1016 01:18:33,708 --> 01:18:34,875 Please, let me go! 1017 01:18:35,210 --> 01:18:36,169 Let me go! 1018 01:18:36,502 --> 01:18:37,544 Let me tell you, 1019 01:18:38,630 --> 01:18:40,506 Till death do us part! 1020 01:18:47,889 --> 01:18:49,056 Don't be scared. 1021 01:18:49,599 --> 01:18:51,434 This kiss absolves you. 1022 01:18:53,853 --> 01:18:54,770 Walk! 1023 01:18:56,022 --> 01:18:58,190 Let go, let go! 1024 01:18:59,192 --> 01:19:00,401 Where do you think you're going? 1025 01:19:01,319 --> 01:19:02,778 Come with me, come with me! 1026 01:19:15,917 --> 01:19:18,127 Play, play! 1027 01:19:25,843 --> 01:19:26,927 Sing. 1028 01:19:27,845 --> 01:19:29,221 Sing! 1029 01:19:55,373 --> 01:19:56,248 Run? 1030 01:19:56,582 --> 01:19:57,457 Where can you run? 1031 01:20:00,545 --> 01:20:02,755 Does it hurt? 1032 01:20:04,424 --> 01:20:07,051 Don't cry, good girl, the wedding is about to start. 1033 01:20:07,385 --> 01:20:09,136 I told you not to run, I already told you! 1034 01:20:09,470 --> 01:20:11,972 Where do you think you're going? Where would you go? 1035 01:20:13,099 --> 01:20:16,310 Keep playing! With feeling! 1036 01:20:16,644 --> 01:20:18,354 Good girl, don't cry. 1037 01:20:19,647 --> 01:20:22,066 Keep singing. 1038 01:20:23,484 --> 01:20:25,486 Tell them you agree, 1039 01:20:25,820 --> 01:20:27,863 tell them you want to marry me. 1040 01:20:28,197 --> 01:20:29,156 Say it! 1041 01:20:30,199 --> 01:20:30,949 III doll 1042 01:20:31,284 --> 01:20:31,909 Say it! 1043 01:20:32,243 --> 01:20:33,661 -No... -Say it! 1044 01:20:33,995 --> 01:20:35,663 Say, "I do!" 1045 01:20:35,997 --> 01:20:38,416 Say it! Say it! 1046 01:20:38,750 --> 01:20:39,667 "I DO!" 1047 01:20:43,129 --> 01:20:45,631 Say it! Say you agree to marry me! 1048 01:20:45,965 --> 01:20:48,258 Say it! Say, "I do!!" 1049 01:20:48,593 --> 01:20:49,385 Say it! 1050 01:20:49,719 --> 01:20:51,887 Say, "I do!" 1051 01:20:54,432 --> 01:20:55,391 Put this on! 1052 01:20:57,018 --> 01:20:58,060 Put it on! 1053 01:21:02,315 --> 01:21:04,358 Gigi, Gigi! 1054 01:21:34,097 --> 01:21:38,597 X Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on X 1055 01:21:39,727 --> 01:21:44,227 X Could it be a faded rose from days gone by? X 1056 01:21:45,358 --> 01:21:49,779 X And did I hear you say he was a-meeting you here today X 1057 01:21:50,154 --> 01:21:54,654 X To take you to his mansion in the sky? X 1058 01:21:58,830 --> 01:22:00,248 Ben! 1059 01:22:08,548 --> 01:22:09,465 Don't... 1060 01:22:22,895 --> 01:22:24,730 I will sacrifice everything for love. 1061 01:22:26,482 --> 01:22:28,609 Because I know what Love is. 1062 01:22:43,458 --> 01:22:47,958 X I'm singing in the rain X 1063 01:22:49,213 --> 01:22:51,882 I'm fall in love with you! 1064 01:22:53,384 --> 01:22:55,386 Ben, no! 1065 01:23:52,902 --> 01:23:54,445 Stop, stop! 1066 01:23:54,779 --> 01:23:56,113 You won't get away! 1067 01:23:58,866 --> 01:24:00,576 You won't get away! 1068 01:24:02,245 --> 01:24:03,412 I'll catch you! 1069 01:24:05,540 --> 01:24:06,165 Miss Gigi! 1070 01:24:06,499 --> 01:24:07,875 Ben killed himself! 1071 01:24:08,543 --> 01:24:09,585 The beast is over there! 1072 01:24:09,961 --> 01:24:12,004 And his corpse became this demon! 1073 01:24:12,338 --> 01:24:13,255 -Fung, Little Turtle! -Yes! 1074 01:24:13,589 --> 01:24:15,048 -Go to true north first. -Got it, sifu. 1075 01:24:15,383 --> 01:24:17,593 I'll lure him to where the Big Dipper marks the spot! 1076 01:24:18,344 --> 01:24:19,178 Beast! 1077 01:24:19,512 --> 01:24:20,846 This time, we'll kill you. 1078 01:24:21,347 --> 01:24:23,223 -Beast your ass, let's go. -Be careful! 1079 01:24:26,519 --> 01:24:28,103 It's sure hard making movies, right? 1080 01:24:28,437 --> 01:24:29,646 I used to be in movies too! 1081 01:24:30,523 --> 01:24:31,398 Have you got it yet? 1082 01:24:31,732 --> 01:24:33,191 -I'm looking! -Look faster! 1083 01:24:33,526 --> 01:24:34,151 You don't believe me? 1084 01:24:34,485 --> 01:24:36,862 I'm Wong Four! I used to be an action star at Shaw! 1085 01:24:37,196 --> 01:24:38,238 Left, go left! 1086 01:24:38,573 --> 01:24:39,282 Left right ahead. 1087 01:24:39,615 --> 01:24:40,699 You can't turn left there. 1088 01:24:41,033 --> 01:24:43,035 I told you to turn left or you're fucked! 1089 01:24:43,369 --> 01:24:44,244 Fuck it, then. 1090 01:24:46,622 --> 01:24:48,999 Just straight ahead, stop the carriage! 1091 01:24:50,418 --> 01:24:51,877 Get off the carriage, come on! 1092 01:24:56,340 --> 01:24:58,342 This is where the Big Dipper marks. 1093 01:24:58,676 --> 01:25:00,135 It's a car lot. 1094 01:25:00,469 --> 01:25:01,052 Hey! 1095 01:25:01,387 --> 01:25:02,930 I don't care if it's the morgue or the artillery, pay up! 1096 01:25:03,264 --> 01:25:05,683 Are you kidding me? I'm the governor of two provinces! 1097 01:25:06,017 --> 01:25:07,393 Even the Governor has to pay! 1098 01:25:08,311 --> 01:25:11,689 You're so mean. No way around it then. 1099 01:25:12,023 --> 01:25:13,733 It's hard earned money! 1100 01:25:14,066 --> 01:25:15,776 -Is that enough? -I'll take it! 1101 01:25:16,569 --> 01:25:18,320 -This way... -Have you found it yet? 1102 01:25:18,904 --> 01:25:20,196 No, this way, this way. 1103 01:25:21,365 --> 01:25:22,866 No, this way, this way. 1104 01:25:23,200 --> 01:25:23,950 Hey, shortcake! 1105 01:25:24,285 --> 01:25:26,370 You're taking us in circles, let's just walk straight. 1106 01:25:26,704 --> 01:25:28,455 What do you know? If you knew, you'd navigate! 1107 01:25:28,789 --> 01:25:30,207 -Follow me! -What a nuisance! 1108 01:25:30,541 --> 01:25:32,042 -Come. -This way, this way. 1109 01:25:33,169 --> 01:25:34,753 No, that way, that way. 1110 01:25:36,339 --> 01:25:37,214 Not quite... 1111 01:25:37,590 --> 01:25:38,507 This way... 1112 01:25:38,841 --> 01:25:39,591 Is this fun for you? 1113 01:25:39,925 --> 01:25:40,759 Shut up! 1114 01:25:41,427 --> 01:25:43,387 This is the safest spot, stay here. 1115 01:25:43,721 --> 01:25:45,681 Hey, find somewhere to hide her. 1116 01:25:49,769 --> 01:25:51,437 -This is for you. -Hide here and don't move. 1117 01:25:51,771 --> 01:25:52,438 Stay hidden, okay? 1118 01:25:52,772 --> 01:25:54,273 -Get down. -Let's go. 1119 01:25:56,776 --> 01:25:59,820 Sihing, Sifu is taking so long... What if he's in trouble? 1120 01:26:00,154 --> 01:26:02,447 You're crazy, Sifu is so powerful, what could happen to him? 1121 01:26:02,782 --> 01:26:06,035 Even though Sifu is so powerful, we still had to pay for that cab. 1122 01:26:06,369 --> 01:26:08,913 That makes me think, what if the demon gets here before Sifu? 1123 01:26:09,246 --> 01:26:11,122 We're unprepared. We'd be at a disadvantage! 1124 01:26:11,457 --> 01:26:13,959 Let's find something to protect ourselves. 1125 01:26:15,252 --> 01:26:15,919 Sifu! 1126 01:26:16,253 --> 01:26:17,504 Sifu, we were so worried! 1127 01:26:17,838 --> 01:26:19,297 We have to get to work. 1128 01:26:24,387 --> 01:26:26,222 -Prepare for the Moonlight Mirror ritual! -Yes! 1129 01:26:31,268 --> 01:26:33,061 Here comes the demon! 1130 01:26:38,109 --> 01:26:39,610 Bring out the moonlight mirrors! 1131 01:26:47,243 --> 01:26:48,285 Be careful! 1132 01:27:39,044 --> 01:27:40,003 Sihing! 1133 01:27:42,214 --> 01:27:43,632 Sihing... 1134 01:27:44,467 --> 01:27:46,844 -Are you alright? -It's a miracle I'm fine, I'm not you! 1135 01:27:47,178 --> 01:27:49,263 You're big, strong, and have the Emperor's protection! 1136 01:28:09,950 --> 01:28:11,284 -To your positions! -Yes! 1137 01:28:12,369 --> 01:28:13,286 Where are the Moonlight Mirrors? 1138 01:28:13,621 --> 01:28:14,455 Shit... 1139 01:28:15,456 --> 01:28:16,415 Over there! 1140 01:28:47,988 --> 01:28:49,864 We're doomed! Sifu can't get wet! 1141 01:28:50,199 --> 01:28:51,200 Now what? 1142 01:29:42,835 --> 01:29:44,795 If we keep going, Sifu will transform! 1143 01:29:45,212 --> 01:29:46,129 Think of something! 1144 01:29:46,505 --> 01:29:49,257 Go stall for time, the Emperor's protection should keep you safe. 1145 01:29:49,592 --> 01:29:51,677 -Are you sure? -Worth a try! 1146 01:29:53,470 --> 01:29:55,722 -Sifu... -Alright! 1147 01:30:01,061 --> 01:30:01,853 Sifu! 1148 01:30:04,231 --> 01:30:05,148 Get out of here! 1149 01:30:05,482 --> 01:30:06,941 -Leave! -No! 1150 01:30:07,443 --> 01:30:09,027 -Leave! -No! 1151 01:30:09,820 --> 01:30:11,363 If you die, we'll die together! 1152 01:30:11,697 --> 01:30:13,031 -Leave! -No! 1153 01:30:14,241 --> 01:30:14,950 Leave! 1154 01:30:32,384 --> 01:30:33,343 Sidai! 1155 01:30:33,677 --> 01:30:34,886 Run, run! 1156 01:30:35,220 --> 01:30:36,095 Sidai! 1157 01:30:37,222 --> 01:30:38,598 Sidai! 1158 01:30:40,684 --> 01:30:41,643 Run! 1159 01:30:44,939 --> 01:30:46,148 To the death! 1160 01:30:46,482 --> 01:30:47,316 Little Turtle! 1161 01:31:41,829 --> 01:31:44,414 Beloved... 1162 01:31:47,751 --> 01:31:49,335 I die by your sword... 1163 01:32:23,328 --> 01:32:24,746 Taoist priest! 1164 01:33:03,452 --> 01:33:04,494 Miss-- 1165 01:33:09,833 --> 01:33:10,917 Are you alright? 1166 01:33:12,002 --> 01:33:12,752 Taoist priest? 1167 01:33:13,087 --> 01:33:16,256 Sir, we found a Japanese sword at the crime scene. 1168 01:33:16,590 --> 01:33:17,215 Is anyone injured? 1169 01:33:17,549 --> 01:33:20,385 Nope, but the scene is messier than Big Goof's home. 1170 01:33:21,345 --> 01:33:23,138 -Keep looking, -Yes, sir! 1171 01:33:24,473 --> 01:33:27,767 Ma Sheung-fung lock down the crime scene. Please take this lady to the hospital. 1172 01:33:28,102 --> 01:33:29,561 Miss, please come with me.